"Si bedda commu u suli. A ma vita fussi vacanti senza ri tia!"

Tag: Prejudices

Dreaming of an Illusion

It is an interesting life living in two opposite cultures. You see swedes dreaming about the perfect sicilian life where la mamma is always a smiling person, father hard working and family stick together and they wish that swedes were more like that. And of course the illusion is not true. While sicilians dream about the perfect swedish system where the goverment gives you alot of money and serves the population with everyhting, and of course that illusion ain’t true either. Somehow we are stuck in the thinking that life is better somewhere else than the life we have, and with these illusion we are never satisfied with our lives.


Det ?r ett intressant liv att leva i tv? motsatta kulturer. Du ser svenskar som dr?mmer om det perfekta sicilianska familjelivet d?r La Mamma ?r alltid en leende person, far h?rt arbetande och familjen h?ller ihop och de vill att svenskarna var mer s?. Och naturligtvis ?r illusionen inte sann. Medan sicilianare dr?mmer om det perfekta svenska systemet d?r staten ger dig en massa pengar och tj?nar befolkningen med allt, och naturligtvis ?r denna illusionen inte sann heller. P? n?got s?tt ?r vi fast i t?nkandet att livet ?r b?ttre n?gon annanstans ?n det liv vi har, och med dessa illusioner blir vi aldrig n?jda med v?ra liv.

Hubby & I – A Sneak Peek into a mixed cultural relation

Hubby and I are actually quite opposites; culturally and how we grew up. In lifestyle we have understood that we want the same things and he is discovering the world and learning to know his own opinions and own style, while I just like to become a farmer. So we have somehow managed to find a middle road. He is not the typical sicilian man, he wants to develop. Of course he has some parts that are typical sicilian e.g. he has difficulties to let me pay, he has also grew up with religious fear, boundaries, gender roles and stories, that for me is quite hard to live with. Well, then on the other hand it has been difficult for him to live with a woman that ain’t a typical local woman, I do not care about little problems, I have opinions, do not care about what neighbors says about us, and want to be involved in big decisions, totally opposite from classical local females. The hardest thing for him to accept is that I do not call him all the time, I want him to go out with his friends and make his drems come true, which for him in the beginning has been a sign that I do not care, but actually it is that I want him to be free and know that I trust him. And then he has to trust me because I work 99,9% with men and travel with them also abroad. This is a part we have had most discussions about.

Hubby & I in Monreale


F?stmannen och jag ?r faktiskt ganska mycket motsatser, kulturellt och hur vi v?xte upp. I livsstil har vi f?rst?tt att vi vill ha samma saker och han uppt?cker v?rlden och l?r k?nna sina egna ?sikter och egen stil, medan jag bara vill bli bonde. S? vi har p? n?got s?tt lyckats hitta en medelv?g. Han ?r inte den typiska sicilianska mannen, han vill utvecklas. Visst har han vissa delar som ?r typiskt sicilianska, t.ex. han har sv?rt att l?ta mig betala, han har ocks? vuxit upp med religi?s fruktan, gr?nser, k?nsroller och ber?ttelser, som f?r mig ?r ganska sv?rt att leva med. Ja, d? d?remot har det varit sv?rt f?r honom att leva med en kvinna som inte ?r en typisk lokal kvinna, jag bryr mig inte om sm? problem, jag har ?sikter, bryr mig inte om vad grannarna s?ger om oss, och vill vara delaktig i stora beslut, helt motsatt fr?n klassiska lokala kvinnor. Det sv?raste f?r honom att acceptera ?r att jag inte ringer honom hela tiden, vill att han g?r ut med sina v?nner och att hans dr?mmar besannas, vilket f?r honom i b?rjan har varit ett tecken p? att jag inte bryr mig, men det ?r faktiskt att jag vill att han ska vara fri och veta att jag litar p? honom. Och d? han m?ste lita p? mig eftersom jag arbetar 99,9% med m?n och reser med dem ocks? utomlands. Detta ?r en stor del av diskussionerna som vi har haft.


An issue I run into not so often but when I do it’s always the question why Sweden has a high suicide rate. Last time at MailBox sending samples. First they praised Sweden, then asked why the hell I am here and then ask about the suicide reason. So of course I told the following, excluding statistics.
Some sicilians blame our high suicide rate because we leave home so early to defend the mammoni culture, but of course it’s not true. Mammoni culture brings other issues we very rarely deal with in Scandinavia.
According to WHO global statistics, Sweden is placed 35 with 11,9 suicides per 100,000 (from 2009). Italy is placed 66 with 6,3 suicides per 100,000 (from 2007).
First of all in Sweden statistics is actually showing the reality quite well, you can almost for sure rely on it. In Italy you can not rely on national statistics if it’s not from e.g. Banca Italia. Sweden is a secular country, so if someone commits suicide, then it’s registred as suicide. In Italy catholics are forbidden to commit suicide, and if they do they go directly to hell. So if a person commits suicide, to avoid hell the death reason can many times be registered as “caused of natural reasons” or “illness”.
And old man stood in line and listened with a stressed face, but he said also that the italians faith issue is true. Especially in south Italy where people still are very religious.

En fr?ga jag inte st?ter p? ofta men n?r jag g?r det ?r alltid fr?gan varf?r Sverige har en h?g sj?lvmordsfrekvens. F?rra g?ngen vid MailBox n?r jag skickade prover. F?rst prisades Sverige, sedan fr?gade vad i helvete jag ?r h?r och sedan undrar de om sj?lvmordsanledningen. S? naturligtvis sa jag f?ljande, med undantag av statistik.
Vissa sicilianare skyller v?r h?ga sj?lvmordsfrekvens p? att vi l?mnar hemmet s? tidigt f?r att f?rsvara Mammoni kulturen, men det ?r naturligtvis inte sant. Mammoni kulturen ger andra problem som vi mycket s?llan st?ter p? i Skandinavien.
Enligt WHO: s globala statistik ?r Sverige placerat 35 med 11,9 sj?lvmord per 100.000 (fr?n 2009). Italien ?r placerad 66 med 6,3 sj?lvmord per 100.000 (fr?n 2007).
F?rst av allt visar Sveriges statistik faktiska verkligheten ganska bra, du kan n?stan s?kert lita p? det. I Italien kan du inte lita p? nationell statistik om det inte kommer fr?n t.ex. Banca Italia. Sverige ?r ett sekulariserat land, s? om n?gon beg?r sj?lvmord, d? det registreras som sj?lvmord. I Italien ?r det f?rbjudet f?r katoliker att beg? sj?lvmord, och om de g?r det hamnar de direkt i helvetet. S? om en person beg?r sj?lvmord och f?r att undvika helvetet, kan d?d orsaken m?nga g?nger vara registrerad som orsakats av naturliga sk?l eller sjukdom. En ?ldre man stod i k?n och lyssnade med ett stressat ansikte, men han sade ocks? att italienarnas trofr?ga i detta ?r sant, speciellt i s?dra Italien d?r de fortfarande ?r mycket religi?sa.

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